Quoi de neuf 032 不吐不快的怀孕烦恼

漫长的 IVF 长跑终于跑到了终点。新年的第二天，早上去诊所抽了血，下午就接到电话，护士说从我的HCG数值来看我应该是"very pregnant!" 挂了电话，两人都松了一口气，我感觉自己心情平静又有些许喜悦。

早就听说前三个月的反应可能很凶险，比如可能会很困很困，或很累很累，或一直恶心想吐。刚开始我完全没有任何反应，还窃喜。没想到到了第六周，我就很快迎来了一个陌生的身体感受——嘴巴里面苦苦的，吃什么都不香了！

刚开始我不怎么在意，觉得应该没什么要紧的吧。然而很快就发现是大意了。这个症状真的让人很痛苦。现在我除了睡觉和吃饭的时候不会感觉到嘴巴里的苦味，其余时间都有一小部分注意力会被它占据。本来我是个特别爱喝水的人，每天至少会喝掉一升的水，现在喝水也变得很痛苦。

随之而来的食欲也变得很奇怪。不同的时刻都会冒出来一些不同的想吃的东西。本来爱吃的东西忽然不爱吃了（白米饭，柚子）。对食物很挑剔，不太能吃剩饭，只能吃新鲜做的。现在我都是前天晚上把菜备好，第二天早上早起做当天的午饭，像个日本主妇一样。另外，对气味也很敏感，家里的有香味的洗手液都只能收起来了。

最近我爱吃杂粮。周末在超市发现有冷冻糯玉米卖，开心坏了！今天就吃了一根玉米做午饭。还喜欢一些调味简单的蔬菜，杏鲍菇和青菜炒一炒，胡萝卜放点油盐微波炉叮一下之类的，都爱不释手。

为了缓解这个似乎永远会存在下去里的嘴巴里的底味，我还破天荒地跑去亚超的蜜饯区搜罗配料表干净的蜜饯果干，虽然找到了一些，但毕竟治标不治本。每天下午到了三四点就是痛苦的巅峰，真的很难忍。于是只能来吐吐苦水。希望我可以早日和这个朋友告别吧！

读书笔记——阿特伍德自传

刚想说今年阿特伍德出了新书，发现已经是去年的事了。2025年阿特伍德出了新书，是她的第一本自传，得知消息后赶紧在图书馆预约系统里排上队。11月新书出版后没等太久就送到家附近的图书馆了。借来翻开一读，发现好看得停不下来！

其实我之前只读过 The Handmaid's Tale，去看过一次她和 Steven Paikin 的现场对谈，对她的文字说不上熟悉，所以这次读这本书，感觉是第一次透过文字好好认识她。她的写作很有节奏感，非常幽默，而且很简洁，一句废话都没有，真不愧是加拿大国宝啊。

书到期了，今天要还回去，读了三分之一，时间线上大致是从她父母的相识讲到她刚去哈佛读博士。很多事情让我印象深刻，比如她童年时期每年的夏天都有几个月住在魁省北部的森林里，因此和自然非常的亲近。她念大学的时候暑假的工作是在夏令营当领队 (counsellor)，负责的就是自然探险和观察的内容。想起我的研究生同学们很多也是夏天都在夏令营做同样的工作，感叹原来这个传统在六十多年前就已经存在了啊。还有她学生时期就显露出来的对文学、戏剧的兴趣和天赋，看着她上学时自己做的万圣节的服装、高中家政课的大作业（一个洗衣服主题的歌剧），再次感受到中国的教育和加拿大的教育真是天差地别啊。

在这里简单摘一些读的时候觉得有趣的段落。

All the Nova Scotians I've known have been universally homesick. I'm not sure why, but so it has been. Both of my parents always referred to Nova Scotia as "home", causing some confusion for me as a child: If Nova Scotia was "home", where was I living? In some sort of not-home? (Chapter 1 Farewell to Nova Scotia, p. 4)

Our parents didn't spend much actual money. Our father, having grown up with even less actual money and a deep education in self-reliance, was of the opinion that you didn't have to be rich to live a satisfying and comfortable life—satisfying meaning that you were warm enough and dry enough, that you had enough to eat (plus tea), and that you weren't being devoured by bears. Or blackflies and mosquitoes. Or anything else. (Chapter 3 Gemini Rising, p. 27)

"Telling the grown-ups" was a flagrant violation of the code of childhood as it exited then. Being a child was much like being in prison: no matter what went on, you couldn't tattle. Nor should you be a crybaby. Overt suffering showed weakness, and anyway, suffering was for others. No one would sympathize with you; they would be more likely to jear. As our mother used to say, quoting Ella Wheeler Wilcox—though we didn't know this, believing instead that she had thought it up herself: "Laugh, and the world laughs with you; / Weep, and you weep alone." And stop whining and snivelling. (Chapter 4 Mischiefland, p. 54)

Each graduating student was assigned a career adviser. Mine said I should drop all these writing and graduate-school ideas because they would not make me happy. Instead, I should find a good man and get married. You can imagine what I thought of that. I did not quote John Stuart Mill to him: "It is better to be a human being dissatisfied than apig satisfied." (The Bohemian Embassy, p. 145)

I was sick for three days with alcohol poisoning. The drink-spiker apologized and the groper clearly hoped I didn't remember. But I did. I know your names, but won't mention them here because it was a long time ago and anyway you are probably dead. But if you've ever wondered why you've had so much bad luck in life, it was the curse of the White Goddess. Just saying. (The Bohemian Embassy, p. 152)